Cult Observer, 1992, Volume 9, No. 4
Dysfunctional Churches
Ronald Enroth, Ph.D.
It is common practice for churchgoers in
American society to refer to their own congregation as their “church family.”
Students away at college make reference to their “home church.” Church people
sing hymns about being part of “the family of God.” Parents often employ family
imagery to convey spiritual content to their children.
As behavioral
scientists remind us all too often, that most basic of social institutions—the
family—is increasingly subject to frailty and failure. The label that is
currently popular for unhealthy families is “dysfunctional.” Unfortunately,
sociologists of religion (as well as many ex‑members) know that some churches
are also dysfunctional, even to the point of being spiritually abusive. If
truth in advertising standards could be applied to religion, some churches would
be required to display a sign reading: “Warning: this church could be harmful to
your spiritual and psychological health.”
Farfetched? Not
if my own research of the past few years has any validity at all. Sadly,
spiritual and pastoral abuse is more prevalent than most people believe. Like
child abuse, it often goes undetected, or else it is strongly denied. Spiritual
abuse is inflicted by persons who are accorded respect and honor in society by
virtue of their positions of religious authority and leadership. When such
leaders violate the sacred trust they have been given, when they abuse their
authority, and when they misuse their ecclesiastical office to control their
congregations, the results can be catastrophic.
What are the
hallmarks of unhealthy, aberrant churches? The key indicator is
control‑oriented leadership, ministers who have a need to “lord it over the
flock.” Abusive leaders demand submission and unquestioning loyalty. The person
who raises uncomfortable questions or does not “get with the program” is cast
aside. Guilt, fear, and intimidation are used to manipulate and control
vulnerable members, especially those who have been taught to believe that
questioning their pastor is comparable to questioning God.
Why does a pastor or
priest sometimes turn into a spiritual tyrant? I believe it is because of the
human desire to control others and to exercise power over people. Each of us
has been exposed to the temptation of power, whether in the role of spouse,
teacher, or parent. An excessive will to power, coupled with sincere religious
motives, can lead to the misuse of spiritual authority.
More than any other
age group, young adults are attracted to abusive churches, their seemingly
dynamic programs, and their “take charge” leaders. Such churches often target
young couples during the crucial child‑bearing years. As a result, the energy
needed by these young couples for legitimate family interaction is siphoned off
into a high intensity cause. Family obligations are sacrificed, and children’s
developmental needs are neglected.
How can we recognize
a healthy church? In addition to matters of appropriate doctrine, a
healthy church is reconciling and restorative, not adversarial and elitist.
Members of healthy churches seek to deepen and strengthen their family
commitments. Legitimate leaders will welcome dissent and hard questions from
members without threat of reprisal. Trustworthy leaders will encourage
accountability, and they will establish checks and balances.
Choose a church
carefully and prayerfully. Remember, not all religion is benign, and not all
church experience is beneficial.
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